Your Dog Is Your Mirror: The Emotional Capacity of Our Dogs and Ourselves Paperback – August 14, 2022

I got it on audiobook. At first I thought it was very boring and stopped listening then one day while folding a mountain of clothes I gave it another chance and decided I loved it. You gotta get past the first chapter then you’re hooked.❤️

Harvey has been a problem since I adopted him. He is beautiful, playful, smart and for some reason would occasionally attack my very mellow older dog Marco. He also would alert me when Marco would be having an occasional seizure. At obedience classes he was the star of the class but as soon as we walked outside he changed back to mostly doing what he wants. His behavior left me frustrated and confused. I often told him if he didn't behave he was going to go live somewhere else. The last time he attacked Marco that changed. I realized I could not adopt him out without revealing his behavior so this time I told him that this was his home forever and it was time to get his act together. Then came this book. Just reading the beginning about his first client was so revealing it opened up something inside me. I made the connection with some very deep dark things inside me and Harveys' actions. I started treating him differently and realized that if his behavior is bothering me I needed to look at myself. Harvey has not hurt Marco since and him and I have deepened our relationship. He still drives me crazy sometimes but I wouldn't trade him for anything. This is one of the most important books I own.

Trainers, training books, dog behavior theorists... I talked to tons of trainers and read tons of books and websites searching for something that would help my dog. But, there was a serious disconnect between what the dog-pros thought and my experience and observations about the whats and whys that energize a dog - my dog. And then I discovered Kevin Behan...My dog, who came to me off the streets, was a barking, shrieking, chasing, biting mess:a danger to himself and others. Your Dog is Your Mirror arrived just in time; I was getting desperate. Behan "gets" dogs. In the book, he explained exactly why my dog acted like he did - what's going on in his head, heart and body AND also what I can do with myself and with him so that we are both relaxed, calm and steady.This isn't about avoidance, submission, obediance, clickers, treats, rules, socializing, or *insert current training gimmick here*. Behan's method (or maybe even non-method) goes deep into the canine heart to set the dog free from fears, traumas, obsessions, over-stimulations, and behaviors that don't work in the human world. He also sets the owner free from guilt and fear that you don't try hard enough, care enough, train long enough, aren't alpha enough, smart enough...Your Dog is Your Mirror is a great book for people who long to live happily *with* their dogs in lieu of lording over them. It is a *MUST READ* for people at their wits end whose dog is aggressive, annoying, snappy, unpredictable, obsessive, hyper, or downright scary.My dog *is* my mirror... and, thanks to Kevin Behan, that truth set us both free.

Kind of a boring read. I didn't finish it.

After getting past the style of the writing, which can be a bit off-putting at times because it is very autobiographical ("I want to read about dogs, so quit talking about yourself!"), this book really did challenge my way of thinking about my dog and our relationship.Don't read this if you want quick-fixes (which never work, just like quick-diets)Don't read this if you want a step-by-step guide on how to get your dog to stop doing some specific problem (hire a trainer for that!).Don't read this if you're going to criticize every use of funny terminology you come across.There was a guy in my senior thesis review class (english lit) during college who would use big, fancy words just to use them. That guy annoyed the crap out of me. "We're discussing walking across campus. You really have to use the word "meander"? Really? ugh." You might get annoyed, as I did, with Behan's use of phrases such as "networked consciousness," "the energetic essence that all things have in common," The problem is, you sort of get what's being implied, but he's using the phrases as if they're common usage. They're not. I get the IDEA of an "energetic essence," but ... Huh?That being said, I do love the way that some of the material is presented. I was constantly surprised by this book. "How we respond to [the way in which] unresolved emotion makes us feel determines ... how we fit ourselves into society at large." It's such a "yeah, Duh, of course!" moment, and yet, it's so much more. Behan's not saying that "Our unresolved emotions determine how we fit into society." He's suggesting that the important thing is How We Respond to feeling that emotion. It's a pretty neat way of looking at things, and forces us to take more responsibility for our reactions to feeling X or feeling Y.Pretty cool.Do read this book if you are interested in making yourself a better owner to your dog!Do read this book if you think that you think that you're the cause of your dog's problems. :)Hint: we all are!

My mind was blown by this book. It helped me understand how to improve communication with my dog and my relationship with her. I read it twice in one week, just to make sure I soaked in all of the information. It also helps explain human behavior in a way I have never come across before.It is written in a style that's pleasant and easy to read. If you want to better understand your dog and strengthen the bond you already have with them, GET THIS BOOK AND READ IT, THEN READ IT AGAIN. You won't be disappointed, and you'll expand your knowledge of how your dog experiences the world.

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